Very bad sign for anyone hoping to see hockey anytime within the next couple of years. All three of you should be very disappointed. The new talks ended with no progress.

And talks have ended without progress before, but… this was like a last-ditch attempt to save the thing. The big bosses weren’t there, it was three guys from each side who were supposed to be the level-headed ones, the guys the most willing to bend, the guys who most wanted to get something done. And it didn’t work.

“We’ve had two good days of communication,” Bill Daly, the NHL’s chief legal officer said. “But we still have very strong philosophical differences. I can’t say we’re any closer.”

These talks seemed like an unorthodox, drastic, desperate thing… and it didn’t help. Not at all.

So… prepare yourself for Lacrosse. NBC has picked up some Lacrosse games to put on the air, presumably in place of the NHL games they were supposed to have this year. And why not… they both have goalies, powerplays, body checks, and appeal mostly to white people. If the Lacrosse people painted the turf white, I might not even notice the difference.

Here’s my guess: Lacrosse games will do better ratings than hockey games. I know I’m more likely to tune in. Lacrosse is something a novelty. There’s a chance I’ll see something new, learn about it and like it, or at least laugh at it for a while. There was no chance of me enjoying Lightning vs. Flames.

And just one more miscellaneous note on hockey… Bill Clement is a dick. If you don’t follow hockey, or never have, you might not be aware that there’s a kind of xenophobic attitude towards European and Russian players. The stereotype is that they don’t care as much, they don’t work as hard, they’re not willing to do the rough stuff, etc. Europeans have been saddled with that rap for a long time.

And now that North American players are going to Europe to play, I guess it’s OK for them to not care. “I try to follow what’s going on in Europe, but it’s meaningless.” Clement added that he doubts many NHL players “will play as hard as they do here.”

“They’re treading water,” Clement said. “They have no team allegiance. No Stanley Cup.”

No double standard there or anything.

For as long as this website’s existed, I’ve been saying that Tracy McGrady isn’t a leader, is a team cancer, and is not someone you’d want on your team. Today, we’re adding Asshole to the list.

57-year-old Fred Chamberlain was working at McGrady’s home in Florida when he was attacked by McGrady Rottweiler. The dog, showing more intensity than McGrady has in his entire career, knocked the old man down a flight of stairs, and oh yeah… bit the tip of his nose off. This guy had to go to the emergency room and say, “Tracy McGrady’s dog bit my nose off.”

So now the guy has filed a lawsuit against McGrady, and my question is this: Why does he have to file a lawsuit? McGrady knows it was his dog, knows the dog is vicious, knows the guy is now missing a nose, and McGrady says he feels terrible about it… so what’s he waiting for? PAY HIM.

Give him whatever he wants… Give him a few mil, give him your adidas contract, give him your spot in the Houston starting line-up if he wants it. Jeff Van Gundy might not mind, either. Unreal. Guy’s missing a nose, and McGrady makes him sue to get paid.

And instead, they’ve announced that they’re joining the NFC West. Vegas oddsmakers have given them 6-5 odds on winning the division title next year. Geographically, it’s a little weird, but how many people know where Temple is anyway? We just won’t tell anyone.

And if that doesn’t work out, their most likely next step is the MAC. They’ve been kicked out of the Big East… but they have decided to stay a Division I-A program, which… I guess is good news. I dunno. I’d ask if they’d rather go 1-10 in DI-A, or win some games in D-II, but who’s to say they’d ever win any games in D-II?

Bill Cosby’s probably pretty happy with the decision. That is, if he’s not too upset about this. Jello puddin’ eatin’ muthafucka.