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I… this is… well… I don’t… whatever.

A state senator in Oklahoma wants chickens to wear boxing gloves so they can stage non-lethal cockfights. That was a difficult sentence to type. With every keystroke, my belief in the goodness and rationality of my fellow human beings waned. I need a nap.

State Senator Frank Shurden, who is described in this article as “a longtime defender of cockfighting,” says that… Y’know what, fuck it. I’m not finishing this sentence. The fact that there is an elected official in the United States who is “a longtime defender of cockfighting” makes me want to tear my own heart out of my chest and leave this cruel world.

HE WANTS FUCKING CHICKENS TO WEAR BOXING GLOVES. THE MAN WANTS CHICKENS TO WEAR BOXING GLOVES SO HE CAN WATCH THEM FIGHT.

I can’t say anymore. Let’s just quote the man.

“Who’s going to object to chickens fighting like humans do? Everybody wins.”

“To me it answers everything. It saves the industry, takes blood sport out and generates revenue for Oklahoma.”

“Let the roosters do what they love to do without getting injured.”

Wow.

Matthew J. Darnell

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