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Deron Williams, Robert Whaley give fake names to cops
December 15th, 2005

Robert WhaleyPolice officers in Utah were questioning Deron Williams and Robert Whaley about a bar brawl, when Williams and Whaley decided to give the cops fake names. Whaley went with “Bobby Williams” and Williams went with “Torry Ellis.” They both could learn a lot from Michael Vick.

They’ve both been cited with providing false information to an officer, and neither of them would’ve faced any charges at all had they just told the truth. And it’s hard to imagine how they got caught, especially in the case of Robert Whaley, because 6′10″ black men are so common in Park City, Utah. Half the black people in Utah play for the Jazz. How did they think that no one was going to catch on to this?

I think we should give Whaley the benefit of the doubt for now… after all, he did go to Cincinnati (before transferring to Walsh), where Bob Huggins taught the team about lying to the cops right after he taught them to play the 2-3 matchup zone. “Alright boys, you’ve got to stay with the cutter until he gets close to another guy, then you switch it. Also, never tell the cops your real name.’ Okay, let’s run that again.”



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4 Responses to “Deron Williams, Robert Whaley give fake names to cops”

  1. Anonymous Says:

    Whaley’s not having a good week. This is from SI.

    “Jazz center Robert Whaley needed stitches in his hand this week after his 2-year-old son accidentally tossed a knife at him.”




  2. the mighty mjd Says:

    That’s actually a story that Whaley made up so the Jazz wouldn’t know he cut his hand in a bar fight…




  3. Anonymous Says:

    Yeah, I can understand why. Getting shanked by a 2 year-old is much more respectable than getting in a bar fight.




  4. Anonymous Says:

    “…after his 2-year-old son ACCIDENTALLY tossed a knife at him.”

    Sounds like “Stewie” Whaley has an Oedipus complex.




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