I’ll be the first to tell you that Jerome Bettis’s role in this Super Bowl, and in fact, on this Steelers team, is a little bit blown out of proportion. He’s a leader and a mentor, and he seems to inspire the other guys, and all that stuff is invaluable. But his actual role on the field… basically, he’s a friendlier TJ Duckett. He’s a short yardage guy, and endzone guy, and a change of pace to Willie Parker.

But on Page 2 today, David Schoenfield makes the point that Jerome Bettis is absolutely not one of the best running backs of all time… and I disagree wholeheartedly. He’s 5th on the NFL’s all-time rushing list. Now, I’m not saying that the all-time rushing list is the end-all be-all for ranking RBs all time, but it’s something. It’s not meaningless. 5th all-time makes a running back pretty great.

The guy argues that Bettis ran for over 1,500 yards just once, and that he has a 3.9 career yards per carry, while other Steelers like Erric Pegram, Richard Huntley, Amos Zereoue, Chris Fu’amatu-Ma’afala and Willie Parker have combined to gain 4.38 yards per carry for the Steelers. He also compares Bettis to a guy like Harold Baines or Don Sutton, someone who was around long enough to compile a lot of stats, but was never truly great.

All of those points ignore important things about Bettis. If I could choose 3.9 yards per carry from any back in the NFL, I’ll take it from Jerome. Because at the 3nd of those 3.9 yards, there’s going to be at least one very sore tackler. He punishes a defense. He wears them down. At the end of the game, the last person a linebacker or DB wants to see coming at them is Jerome Bettis.

I think Bill Cowher prefers that kind of offense. Give him the choice between, say, Zereoue, breaking one for 20 yards, or Bettis rushing 5 times, getting 4 yards per carry, and Cowher wants the 2nd option. It controls the clock, it lengthens drives, and it wears down the defense. I really believe that through the years, Bill Cowher and the Steelers have designed things that way.

And a lot of Bettis’s carries, especially in recent years, come in short-yardage situations. Are you going to hold it against the guy that on a 4th-and-1, he gets a yard and a half? He’s outstanding in those situations… he’s got the patience, vision, and quick feet to find the hole, and then the power to force himself through it. The Steelers beat the Chargers this year because of what Jerome Bettis was able to do late in the game in short-yardage situations.

Longevity means something. This guy seems to hold it against Bettis, or at least discount it as a factor. I don’t see it that way. Why shouldn’t it be a positive for Bettis that he’s been able to keep himself healthy and stay around for a while? Not everyone can do that.

I once said that you could make a case for Jerome Bettis as one of the greatest athletes in the world. Now, it was said half-facetiously, and probably drunk, and I’m not really suggesting that Bettis is one of the greatest athletes in the world, but… consider that he became the NFL’s 5th-all-time leading rusher, and he did it as a fat guy. A man of that size having that kind of quickness is just not natural… in fact, it’s fucking superhuman. Take any other great athlete… Kobe Bryant, Lance Armstrong, LaDainian Tomlinson, Wayne Rooney, Ichiro… and strap 150 pounds to their back, and then let’s see what a great athlete they are. Kobe as a fat guy is Robert Traylor. Lance Armstrong as a fat guy is an accountant.

I mean, you line up all the other great RBs ever, and look at them… in their prime, they were chiseled. Bettis accomplished the same things, more than most of them, as a fat guy. I mean, we’re not talking about 1st basemen here, or sumo wrestlers, or golfers. We’re talking about running backs in the National Football League… a position that contains, truly some of the greatest athletes in the world. And a fat guy had made himself one of the best. That’s remarkable.

There’s just no way to judge this trade. If Ron Artest was a normal guy, it would certainly be a win for Sacramento. I’d like to say it’s a win for Sacramento… I think it will be a win for Sacramento. But you just never know when Ron’s going to decide to rip someone’s heart out of their chest in the 3rd quarter of a game and eat it at the next timeout.

I really like Ron Artest… I belive he’s a good guy with a big heart, with something just a little bit off upstairs. but if he shows up to play, his heart’s in it, he just goes about his business, he can be great there. The fans in Sacramento (like the ones in Indiana) are very supportive of their guys. So if he can get on their good side, he just might love it and thrive there. I hope that’s the case.

Because when you compare them as players… well, there is no comparison. They’re probably going to get you about the same amount of points per game. But Ron can get them in a variety of different ways. He can shoot from outside, he can post up, he can drive, he’s got the midrange shots… he creates a ton of matchup problems. Peja does very little of that. And defensively, it’s not even worth talking about.

So from the Pacers point of view, it depends on how you look at it. If you see it as getting Peja for Artest, you lose big time. But if you see it as getting Peja for nothing, then sure, you win. Peja is a great shooter, he can put the ball on the floor a little bit, and he’ll definitely stretch a defense. Both Stephen Jackson and Jermaine O’Neal will benefit from his presence. But he’s not Artest… and Rick Carlisle’s got a major challenge ahead of him in getting Peja’s defense up to a reasonable level.

That is the name that Houston has chosen for their new MLS team. They are the Houston 1836.

I don’t fucking get it, but… you know, in a way, it’s brilliant. It got some attention. What else is going to get people talking about an MLS team in January… or any other time of the year, for that matter? It is, if nothing else, original. If a team is going to name themselves after a year, it’s usually the last two digits, with “ers” at the end. Not these guys. Sometimes, you have to admire someone to say, “Hey, this makes no sense, but fuck it.”

Attention really had to be the name of the game. And unless you want to call your team the Houston OJ’s, or the Houston Thundercocks, or the Houston Paul Wall’s Teeth, then this is probably a nice way to go.

Check out Vince Carter’s take on Kobe’s 81-point night:

“The only bad thing about it is that younger kids, whose minds are easily warped, are going to think, ‘Ohhh! I am going to go out there and do it instead of (honoring) the team concept first. That is what is missing in the game, guys understanding how to play as a team.

“I think it is great for (the NBA): They want scoring, they want ratings, and you are going to get that. You are definitely going to get them now with the amount of 50-point games, 60-plus games. I just hope that kids and young guys understand that (only) special guys can do that. Yeah, the (other Lakers) were trying to get Kobe the ball, they wanted to see a special night. But they all know their roles.

“Guys understanding their roles is probably the hardest thing to accept in the NBA right now. Everybody wants to prove they are a professional, wants to be a star in this league. You can still become a star in your own right if you just play your role.”

Alright, I want to know who’s feeding Vince Carter lines. Does he have Red Auerbach speaking to him through a hidden earpiece? Because I know he didn’t say that. The guy who cried his way out of Toronto by half-assing it did not say that.

Whoever said that, though, is absolutely right. And that’s not a knock of Kobe or his accomplishment… I could say that it was absolutely the right thing for Kobe to score those 81 points, and it would still be bad for kids to see. Just beause they’ll see what Kobe did, they’ll see the media’s reaction to it, and they’ll believe that all the glory is in scoring points. I think there’s truth in that, regardless of Kobe’s actual intent.

But at the same time… you know, those same kids already have pretty terrible ideas about what it is to be a great basketball player. And it doesn’t take an 81-point game for that to happen. All it takes is a few viewings of SportsCenter. It’s always about the points, it’s always about the dunks, it’s always about the flashy highlights. That’s not Kobe’s fault, that’s everyone’s fault.

I mean, you could blame that on a lot of things. SportsCenter, the NBA itself, lack of good coaching through the entire basketball system, Nike commercials, etc. And hey, speaking of Nike commercials, I think I just saw one starring Vince Carter that’s all about glorifying the slam dunk. What’s that doing for the kids, Vince? Is that sending the right message? “Buy $120 shoes and slam dunk the basketball. Come on. Do it for the kids.” Idiot.

I’m not even going to get into Vince Carter, his style of play, his quitting on him team in Toronto, his being a general douchebag. There’s no point, because he didn’t say that. I think he overheard someone say it on the subway or something, and he just repeated it.

You probably know the story by now. Kings and Pacers agree to Artest/Peja swap. Artest says he doesn’t want to go to Sactown. Kings pull out of deal. Pacers and Artest to meet tomorrow.

In that meeting, I’m pretty sure that Donnie Walsh and Larry Bird are going to tell Ron Artest that if he doesn’t report to Sacramento like a good boy, that he’ll be sitting out for the entire year. I don’t believe they’re bluffing.

And that can’t be an option for Artest. He missed all of last year, and most of this one. At some point, if you want to resume your NBA career, you’ve got to show that you have some kind of passion for the game. You’ve got to demonstrate that you want to be back on the court. The one nice thing that people have always said about you is that you’re a gamer, and that you show up and play hard. If you don’t still have that going for you, then… you’re kinda screwed, Ron.

We all get that you’re crazy. You’re a different kind of guy, you’re very special, and that’s great. But you need to play basketball. For the good of your own career, just go play in Sacramento. Hell, you might like it. It’s a very small market, you can stay out of the spotlight (if you so chose) and work on rebuilding your career. You’ll have owners who will bend over backwards for you, you’ll have a permanent hook-up in Vegas, and oh yeah, you’ll be playing basketball again. That’s good, right?

The whole thing has just become bizarre… sad, really. I miss watching Ron Artest play basketball. It’s almost a parody of itself. If the trade does go through, we’ll talk more about it later.

And I’m with her. Obviously, no disrespect is intended to Roberto Clemente, a great player and an unbelievable man. But there’s only one Jackie Robinson, and Major League Baseball should have an honor for him that’s not enjoyed by anyone else. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.

He did something that no one before him had the combination of balls and talent to do. And no one after him will have the same opportunity, because Jackie Robinson laid it down for them. That deserves an honor reserved for just one man.

And again, it’s nothing against Clemente. If MLB set aside kind of honor for him that no one else could ever have, I think that would be great. Rename the World Series trophy for him. Call the All-Star Game the Clemente Classic from now on. Any honor they want to bestow on Clemente is fine, and is well-deserved, because no one in the history of sports was a better guy than Clemente. But leave the leaguewide retiring of the # to Jackie Robinson, and Jackie Robinson alone.

Man, I hate this attitude. There are those out there who believe that because the Super Bowl doesn’t have players on the opposing teams who hate each other, becaise it doesn’t have teams from big markets, because it doesn’t have an attention-starved, me-first dickweed like Terrell Owens, because it doesn’t have a hick choke-artist who’s dating a country music superstar…that it’s boring.

I just hate that attitude. The teams that have earned a place there are there. This is not professional wrestling. If you’re upset because you don’t think King Kong Bundy should get to challenge for the title at Wrestlemania, then fine, feel free to bitch… because it was someone’s poor decision who put him there. But the Steelers and Seahawks are there because they earned those spots. That’s how it works. That’s the very nature of sports. If you don’t like it, you don’t like sports. Go watch American Idol.

Some quotes from yesterday’s Daily Quickie, who has dubbed Super Bowl XL “Super Bore” and “Whoop-de-do-per Bowl”…

NFL fans have become spoiled by the Pats dynasty; even this season, our expectations were that we’d see the most improbable Pats title of all — or at least the breakthrough of Peyton Manning and the Colts.

There’s simply not the drama of years past. Can’t Shaun Alexander go a little “T.O.” on us, just to spice things up?

Even a Freddie Mitchell imitation from Matt Hasselbeck would make things more interesting at this point.

It doesn’t matter that the Spurs or the White Sox were worthy champs. Excellence has taken a backseat to our jones for outsize drama.

Maybe you jones for outsize drama. I jones to see who’s the best. I want to see who’s going to be the World Champion. That’s enough for me, because I like sports. If you need outlandish characters and plot twists, give up sports and go watch Desperate Housewives or something.

And I think they deserve it. You can certainly make a case for Duke deserving to hang on to the top spot, but UConn can make a better one. They’re the better team. Duke’s best two players (Redick, Shelden Williams) are better than UConn’s two best (Rudy Gay, Rashad Anderson), but after that, it’s a UConn landslide.

Marcus Williams, Josh Boone, Hilton Armstrong, Denham Brown… on other teams, those guys are stars, and they can also get you a hell of a deal on a laptop. Duke just doesn’t have nearly the depth… Melchionni’s turned himself into a good role player, and Josh McRoberts has a ton of potential, but after that, there’s not a lot to get excited about.

Anyway, Duke sticks at #2. Florida falls to 4 in the AP, and 5 in the Coaches. Georgetown, 12-4 with a win over Duke, opens up at #21 in the AP, but somehow, remarkably, does not crack the Coaches Top 25. They’re not even the first team out. That, I don’t understand.