Today, of course, is Valentine’s Day… and for those of you without significant others to spend the day with, it is also Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition day, and the issue has been known to get many a young boy through an otherwise cold and lonely night.
And I think it’s important that this exists because, as sports fans, it’s important for us all to be kept abreast of swimwear fashion. When I get up in the morning, I check the top sports headlines, the NBA boxscores, and any new trends in contemporary bathing attire. It’s important to me.
I just checked it out… and this season’s “in” style? Whorish. Many bathing suits this year are apparently coming without tops, requiring women to wrap their arms across their chests. Inconvenient, yes, but whorish… and whorish is everything this season.
And if you’re interested in taking your whorosity to the next level, Molly Sims sports a $30 million diamond bathing suit, the perfect look to say, “I have a grossly inflated view of the value of my pussy.”
alex Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 3:59 pm
“Heidi Klum Wearing Just Paint”
my two reactions are:
* they just arent even trying to fool anyone anymore, are they
*awesome
DookieStyle Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 4:06 pm
upon reading that last line…
I squirted pee into my underpants.
tee hee.
BigBoi Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 4:18 pm
Wow 3 black women and none on the cover, progress baby, muthafuckin progress. Unless this is Sports Illustrated way of saying “white women are hands down better looking than all other women, HAIL HITLER!!!!”
Rob Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 4:18 pm
I bow to your powers of both observation and description. Sims in a $30 million suit I don’t understand, but now Jodie Foster …..
BigBoi Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 4:48 pm
It’s funny to me how SI chooses to put up Sharapova instead of trying to get Serena. I don’t know about ya’ll but a woman with curves just does alot more for a bikini to me. I have a question, this has been a mystery to me for awhile; Do white guys really like Paris Hiltonesque emaciated broads? I don’t get it, it just looks so much more lovely when a woman is voluptuous, ya know curves i.e. a nice Beyonce booty and some nice big ole Serena williams titties that you could motorboat in all day long. All the women in this swimsuit mag have their fuckin ribs visible, that’s nasty. A white guy I work with was like “the Olsen twins have come into their own and Lindsay Lohan is just gorgeous” and I asked him “what, are you into feeding chicks and nursing them back to health?? Because the ones you just mentioned are just sickly looking” He answered “they aren’t sickly they are in great shape” WTF?????? Do white people and black people just have a whole different opinion of what ‘in shape’ means?? Those three women look like they weigh a combined 150 pounds, there is something seriously wrong when 3 people add up to 150lbs, unless they are little kids or midgets. Oh well this is just something I will never understand, it’s like in ‘The Mask’ Cameron Diaz is just hot as fuck, then she goes and drops a bunch of weight and is in the emaciation proclamation club and is now retched, and disgusting. Our society needs to stop making these dumb ass Hollywood chicks think that toothpicks are hot, thank god my beautiful black women don’t succumb to this line of thinking. Happy Valentine’s day to all and to all a “good” night.
The Big Picture Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 5:00 pm
i can think of damn near 30 million chicks i’d rather fuck than molly sims. she’s not, but there are plenty better. take any nfl cheerleader for example.
boo boo Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 6:00 pm
First of all - DookieStyle, you’re killing me. Second, I love that the subject of this post is “Trim” - priceless. One day, I’ll look forward to browsing through the countless other post filed in the same category.
Yo Yo Mother Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 6:13 pm
Big picture, you just named about 500. Now name 29,999,500 more.
BigBoi Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 6:25 pm
I know that this question was not directed at me but……. 98% of the NBA cheerleaders, 80% of the NCAA cheerleaders, 70% of the shoe models (strippers) in this country, and 30% (I’m pretty picky) of the world’s population of womenfolk.
rwn3f Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 8:14 pm
molly simms is a top 50 celebrity lay. You’re delusional if you think otherwise (Name one thing wrong with her!). Though I guess whorish is more then a swimsuit fad if you’re going with the NFL cheerleaders.
By the way, no one on the planet tops this girl. http://www.hogrockcafe.com/rachel_mcadams.htm (not safe for work).
She Will Be Mine
VTHokie01 Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 9:07 pm
“Posted in TRIM.”
Good shit, MJD. I expect the “Trim” category to somewhat larger.
VTHokie01 Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 9:27 pm
dude, I swear I’m typing words and they don’t show up. That’s twice in a row now.
Mullet Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 9:30 pm
Molly Sims does kinda have missile titties, but I’m a sucker for a Kentucky girl.
Rusty Says:
February 14th, 2006 at 11:25 pm
I never noticed Rachael McAdams’s breast augmentation scars. It looks like someone went at her nipples with a coat hangar.
And Serena Williams is way hotter than Sharapova.
That is all.
snake Says:
February 15th, 2006 at 10:50 am
hey big boi
tyra has been on the cover at least 2 or 3 times and they have always included women on many colors int he mag. your comments about linsay and the olsens i agree with. ribs and sickly skinny women are gross. but a nice athletic trim body is quite hot, like sharapovas. serenas curvaceous bod is also hot.
BigBoi Says:
February 15th, 2006 at 2:04 pm
Yeah I know about Tyra and there have been others but you’d think that during Black History month they’d at least make an attempt to include some women of color on the cover. They don’t even have to be just black women, shit they could be asian, hispanic, native american, I don’t know about you but I like variety in my honeys. Rachael McAdams does have some missle titties, but she looks damn good in the Wedding Crashers. “I’m a cocksman!!!!!!!!” I have no problem with white women whatsoever, i just like inclusion of everyone. I’ve got a daughter on the way she will be of mixed heritage and would hope that by the time she’s a teenager she can look at something like the cover of the Swimsuit Edition and at least feel like she’s included in the broad (no pun intended) view of what’s mainstream “hot”. Am I alone in this or do other enlightened 21st century people agree???
Mullet Says:
February 15th, 2006 at 3:54 pm
yeah, i prefer chicks to have some tits and ass. lohan WAS hot when she still had her baby fat. those were the good ole days. the olson twins always looked like aliens. i never understood the fascination with them other than the fact they were twins.
as for the tennis chicks, I’d rank them anna k, serena, and then sharapova. but that’s just me.
BigBoi Says:
February 15th, 2006 at 4:20 pm
I agree with your Tennis chick ranking, Anna K “looks like the kind of chick that would just………. unh, oh I’m sorry Peter man”!! - Office Space
But let’s be real it’s not like Hournykova really “plays” tennis, so……….. Anyways, anyone who wouldn’t want to slide a finger down the crack of Serena’s ass, and motorboat in those titties, is gay in my book. lol
Fuck you thats why Says:
February 21st, 2006 at 2:40 am
Can’t wait to get that magazine and masturbate to that picture of Molly Sims in the $30M bikini.
Fucking Hot!
Nick Says:
June 19th, 2006 at 2:31 pm
They’re all fucking hot!
My ranks..
1. Anna K. I sweat just looking
2. Sharapova. same thing
3. serena