Kicking indoors, on a rug… Adam Vinatieri might not miss another kick. He’s also probably about to become the first kicker ever taken in the first round of most fantasy drafts.

It’s going to be weird as hell to see that last name across the back of a royal blue jersey. In fact, it’s going to be weird just knowing that the Colts have a player on their roster who isn’t a total fucking donkey when the pressure’s on.  Also, he’s apparently into gay glamour photography.

I think it’s a great move for the Colts. Whatever they’re paying for him, it’s worth it. Hell, I think they should name him team captain. I think he should wear all three of his rings to every practice, just to remind Peyton Manning what a winner looks like.

I still do not understand why the Patriots let him go. If he wanted a little more scratch, they should have given it up. Go rent Rounders, skip ahead to the end and listen to Teddy KGB: Pay him. Pay that man his money.

If the different between what he wants, and what the club is willing to spend is even as much as $2 million… big fucking deal. Adam Vinatier’s leg has made Bob Kraft more money than a measly $2 mil a year. That leg might be the most valuable appendage in football. Adam Vinatieri’s leg is worth more than Christina Aguilera’s pussy. And it’s been seen by fewer people.

This could be the most important transaction of the off-season. I’m not saying it is, because, certainly, some great players are changing teams… Edgerrin James, Julian Peterson, LaVar Arrington, etc… but the Colts and Patriots are both going to be in the playoffs, and sooner or later, someone’s going to need a field goal. One team’s going to look to the sidelines and see a quivering, unproven, tower of nerves, and one team is going to see Adam Vinatieri and his balls of steel.