Archive for April 5th, 2006

April5

NASCAR Upset With Dateline NBC

By: the mighty mjd

Nothing at all redneckish about this...Dateline NBC, a news program, was looking to investigate the treatment of people in American who “look Muslim.” So they found a few dudes who fit whatever description they were looking for, and set them to… a NASCAR race.

The NASCAR people are mad. The NASCAR people can also suck me. When the rebel flags are gone from the parking lot, then maybe you can bitch about being branded racist. Until then, however, the NASCAR people and their symbol of southern pride can go fist themselves. It’s like walking into a restaurant wearing an OJ Simpson jersey and carrying a knife, and then wondering why the waiters seem a little unsure of you.

Now, don’t misunderstand… I’m not saying that all, or even most, NASCAR fans are racist. I don’t believe that. But if you’re looking for racists, I don’t think it’s that bad of an idea to follow the rebel flags.

Posted in: Car Racing35 comments

April5

Four Day Festival Of Sappy Piano Music Set To Tee-Off

By: the mighty mjd

Everyone remembers the 1942 tournament where a stuffed mouse came out of nowhere to win the whole thing.Starting today, Jim Nantz is back where he belongs: Butler Cabin. My buddy Danks thinks Jim Nantz should be locked in the Butler Cabin at Augusta National and never ever allowed to leave. I agree completely, and I’ve contacted Craig Stadler to see if he’d accept $20 to knock Nantz out and chain him to a pipe in the boiler room. No word yet.

If you’re looking for something to do on the Internet, and themightymjd.com just isn’t doing it for you, you can had on over to Masters.org and watch everyone play Amen Corner. Coverage of that begins at 10:45. You can also watch live coverage of the practice tee all long, if you’re the kind of person who would be into that thing. Of course, if you’re the type of person who’s into watching golfers practice, I’d also recommend some LSD.

My pick to win is, of course, Tiger Woods. My second choice is Tiger Woods. My third choice, just to mix things up a little bit, is Eldrick Woods.

Posted in: Golf8 comments

April5

Dwight Gooden Prefers Prison To Rehab

By: the mighty mjd

Seems like a looooong time ago.Doc had a choice. Go to prison for one year… or just go to rehab, but if you slip and test positive for cocaine again, you do five years.

Doc Gooden chose prison, and that’s about the saddest thing I’ve ever heard. That is a man who feels truly powerless over his addiction, and has no faith in his ability to beat it. That just breaks my heart.

There really isn’t a lot to say about it, other than it’s just sad as fuck. I hope he has a friendly cellmate. I hope his soap is easy to grip and difficult to drop. I hope he finds some strength and some help in dealing with this thing. Have a good stretch, Doc.

Posted in: Baseball, Criminality10 comments

April5

Seton Hall Granted Permission To Chat With Jim Larranaga

By: the mighty mjd

ARRRRRGH.Seems like Seton Hall can’t really go wrong here… no one in the world would be able to complain about the hiring of Jim Larranaga. He just put the finishing touches on arguably the most impressive coaching accomplishment in recent history. He might be a decent choice.

Now, I have no idea if he’s actually interested… he might be the kind of guy who really wants to stay in one place. Of course, he might also be the kind of guy who likes big fat paychecks, and certainly, no one could blame him for that. He would, however, have to agree to live in New Jersey, and I don’t know why anyone would want to do that.

If he does end up taking the offer, or some other offer, even, you’d have to feel a little bit for George Mason. Great coaches just don’t grow on trees, and it would be unfortunate for the fans to see something so great happen… and then have the rug snatched from under them like that. I’m not saying that no one alive could’ve done what Larranaga did at Mason, but it’s hard to imagine anyone stepping in and replicating that kind of success, at least right away.

Posted in: College Hoops7 comments

April5

Throwing A Syringe Is Weak

By: the mighty mjd

That is a terrible, terrible, rug. Does he have no family? That's as bad as Maury in Goodfellas.At least in comparison to some of these beauties. Mark Bechtel of SI.com must’ve done some serious research to come up with a list of the 10 best things that were ever thrown onto a playing field. Some of my favorites…

- Northwestern basketball fans throwing carpet samples onto the floor to ridicule the rug on Illinois coach Lou Henson’s head.

- A fan ran onto the pitch during a World Cup game and dropped off a car door.

- A cell phone. It doesn’t sound awesome, but the guy wasn’t throwing the cell phone just to throw the cell phone. He was arguing with his friend, who wanted to leave early… and he grabbed the guy’s cell phone out of his hands and just chucked it onto Wrigley field.

- Another soccer fan throw a severed pig’s head at Luis Figo as he took a corner kick.

There are more. Check ‘em out.

Posted in: Soccer5 comments

April5

Lady Terrapin Fans Do Some Lady Rioting

By: the mighty mjd

You're under arrest for watching women's basketball.As noted on Deadspin earlier today, the Maryland Terrapins won the national title last night in women’s basketball, and the victory was followed by some significant rioting on the Maryland campus. A woman was hit by a car and seriously injured, a bunch of students attempted to turn over a bus, fires were set, etc.

There was no major damage, apparently, so I’m not going to make that big a deal about it, but… the behavior of those involved is just ridiculous. I’m not anti-celebration. Go nuts. You can have a bonfire… but you can’t just start tearing shit down and setting it on fire at random locations. It is not OK to turn over a bus because you’re happy about women’s basketball.  Although you know when Trey Wingo heard about the rioting, she thought, “Another positive step for women’s college basketball.  We’re really gaining ground.”

And that’s my point. I could be wrong, but I don’t believe the people who are genuinely happy about the victory are the ones lighting things on fire and trying to tip over a bus. These people are not happy about women’s basketball. These are not fans cheering. These are jagoffs who want an excuse to act like a completel fuckhead and just start destroying things… because I know damn well they don’t care that much about women’s basketball. Half of them probably didn’t even know what they were out there celebrating… but sure, pushing over a bus sounds like fun, so they did it.

To those who were that excited about the women’s basketball victory that they run around jumping and screaming… that’s kinda weird, but congratulations. To those who just felt like causing some destruction… you belong in prison.

Posted in: College Hoops, Criminality7 comments

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