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Argos Want Ricky
April 28th, 2006

Run towards freedom, Ricky.The Toronto Argonauts of the Canadian Football League want to bring Ricky Williams aboard for the 2006 football season. Canadian teams submit lists of guys they want rights to negotiate with, and the Argos were the only team that thought to add Ricky to their list.

It’s perfect. It’s absolutely perfect… I’m going to predict that Ricky does end up toting the rock for the Argos, and also that he never comes back. He’ll be adored… he’ll be the best player in the league. It’s a perfect, low-pressure situation for him. No one gives a fuck about football in Canada. They’re too busy watching hockey and curling, calling ham “bacon” and enjoying their universal health care. None of that spotlight or scrutiny that Ricky’s never liked. It’s absolutely ideal. Listen to this guy:

Argos VP of football operations Adam Rita: “People have to understand, it isn’t the same climate in our league. Their pressure isn’t the same. The pressure in the NFL is just relentless, from every angle, you know? It isn’t quite the same for us. Now, don’t get me wrong, we want really good citizens, too. But we understand that there are circumstances, some things that arise with players, where it goes a little bit off-center. We’re willing to give them a chance to get back on track and regain focus.”

That guy might as well be Ricky’s dad. Now, the money wouldn’t be ideal… the most he could make is about $150,000. But hey, I don’t think Ricky’s going out and buying Hummer H3s every other weekend. Give him a pair of sandals, a Phish CD, and a bag of Toronto’s finest sticky, and he’s straight.

I don’t know why I’m so excited about this… it’s not like I care about the Toronto Argonauts or Canadian football. It’s just perfect for Ricky… I really want him to do it.



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7 Responses to “Argos Want Ricky”

  1. theotheruw Says:

    Argos already have a former Jag (Soward?) that was suspended indefinately for drug violations. The question is whether Miami will be dicks about it. They went out of their way to get their $8 mill signing bonus back, and they have to give written consent for Ricky to go play in another league. I think the guy should declare bankruptcy, petition to have his child support modified (what kid needs $4,600/month in child support?), and then go to Canada forever.




  2. Jon Says:

    I hear Canada has got some good weed. It’s a match made in heaven.




  3. unc_samurai Says:

    There’s two former top draft picks in the CFL that screwed up royally in the substance abuse policy realm. Soward and some lineman for (drumroll) the Eagles!




  4. Sam Says:

    Canadians certainly aren’t enjoying their health care very much right now:

    http://www.haciendapub.com/aubrey.html

    and

    http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10988596/




  5. textennison Says:

    Canada would be a great fit for him, yeah, but what I really want to see is Ricky Williams on the Montgomery Maulers.




  6. Sandy Mac Says:

    Actually, the highest paid player n the CFL plays for the BC Lions and makes around $400,000. You might remember him, he was a clip board holder for your boys in San Diego, Dave Dickenson.

    Ricky could make a very comfortable living playing n the CFL if he wanted to. Not only sould he be far and away the best player in the league and there for command top salary, he’d be able to smoke some of the finest pot n the world on his trips to play those Lions.

    Cheeba :)




  7. Ron Says:

    The problem with our health care system is balance. Anyone who wants to make changes modifictions and the idiot left screams that it is going to become a Two tiered system like the US has. One for poor and one for the rich.

    A few fundamental changes and the system will be fine. Look at Sweden for a model for good health care.

    Secondly, the CFL is pretty big up here. Football fans here have the best of both worlds. We have an exciting Canadian game and we get the NFL.




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