Archive for June 2nd, 2006

The Mavs were down 7 late in the third quarter, Phoenix was on a run, and looking like they were in the midst of one of those spurts where they’re just going to hit shots, no matter what the other team does. The Mavs were reeling and looking helpless with Josh Howard on the bench. They needed a hero. They were holding out for a hero ’til the end of the night. He had to be strong, he had to be fast, and he had to be fresh from the fight.

And Dirk did it. He went to another level, when it mattered the most, when if he didn’t, the Mavs would be down 3-2, elimination staring them in the grill, and heading to a buck-wild America West Arena (or whatever they call it now) for a Game Six. But he wouldn’t let it happen. He demanded the ball, he took advantage of whatever Phoenix game him, he showed off his all-around game, and he beat the Suns. He put the Mavericks on his back, and he beat the Suns. As Steve Kerr said, last night, he went from a terrific player to a dominant player.

That’s why the NBA Playoffs are so good. You don’t get to see a guy transform like that right in front of you every day. And it’s great to see. As you know if you’re a longtime visitor, I’ve had my problems with Dirk in the past. In fact, towards the beginning of this season, I was working on a point/counterpoint piece for another website, where I argued that a team that had Dirk Nowitzki as their best player could never win a championship.

And in an indirect way, I stand by that. I don’t think the Mavericks could win a championship with that Dirk Nowitzki, the one that existed before he grew so much this year. He’s expanded his repetoire. He used to be worthless in the post, now he can punish a little guy on the block. I think Avery Johnson’s been great for him, in terms of becoming a leader on that team. And he used to shrink when the spotlight and the pressure were on, and last night, he used that spotlight and that pressure like Jimi Hendrix used LSD. It made him better. It put him in a zone.

And he may never be a great defensive player, but you know what… that’s OK. It’s just something that has to be accepted. He’s not perfect, and he doesn’t have to be. The Mavericks don’t need him to be. It’s a flaw, it’s who he is, and if his team can work around it and still do what they need to do, that’s fine. Performances like the one he put on last night can still make him among the NBA’s elite.

On every other team he’s been on, Tim Thomas has, in one way or another, been a failure. Philadelphia drafted him and got rid of him in two years. He was a very average player with Milwaukee for a long time, despite his tremendous size and skills. Same with the Knicks. In Chicago, his play and attitude were so bad that they paid him to go away. They’re still paying him.

And now, all the sudden, he gets to Phoenix, and he’s blowing kisses to Dirk Nowitzki, blowing on his hot shooting hand, and walking through Mavericks huddles. He’s spent his entire career being a fuck-up, and all the sudden, he gets to a system where he fits in perfectly, and he’s pulling the superstar routine. I’m sorry. That’s not allowed.

There is exactly one team in the NBA where Tim Thomas could be putting up the kinds of numbers he’s putting up, and that’s Phoenix. He’s not asked to play with any sort of structure and discipline. Just knock down open shots from the outside when a big guy won’t get out there and guard him, or go to the block when they put a little guy on him. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he’s playing great… it just drives me fucking crazy.

Maybe instead of hating on Tim Thomas, I should just compliment Mike D’Antoni… because he’s putting him in a position to succeed. The beauty of the Suns is that they’ll always be able to live on other teams’ garbage. I really believe that. Guy doesn’t want to play hard? Well, I bet he will when he’s guaranteed open shots if he’ll just run hard. Guy’s particular set of skills don’t fit into a more structured system, or some other coach won’t use them? Mike D’Antoni will find a way. It’s kind of brilliant, really.

According to his agent, world class sprinter Justin Gatlin has been contacted by the Philadelphia Eagles about possibly becoming a kick returner/wide receiver. Gatlin last played football in the 10th grade. And not to cast any doubts on Gatlin’s abilities, but… there is a certain set of skills that one must develop and maintain to become a wide receiver. Possessing blazing speed isn’t the only prerequisite. And if it is, someone forgot to let Az Hakim know.

So yeah, this seems a little desperate. I wonder what could be causing that. Perhaps we should have a look at that Eagles receiver depth chart…

Jabar Gaffney
Todd Pinkston
Reggie Brown
Greg Lewis
Darnerian McCants
Jason Avant
Billy McMullen
Carl Ford

Yeah, that’s not a bad list… if you’re the Frankfurt Galaxy. My goodness, that’s an ugly list. In fact, on second thought, I don’t know why they’re stopping with Justin Gatlin. Asafa Powell is currently without an NFL contract. My neighbor’s pretty fast… and I believe Carl Lewis is available.

So, take a quick guess… what percentage of players in Major League Baseball are African-American.

Eight percent. Man, that seems low. I mean, I knew it was diminishing, but I didn’t know it was that bad. It was 27% back in 1975. Now it’s down to 8%… the lowest figure since the Major Leagues were fully integrated back in 1959.

So we’re giving it up for Torii Hunter today, who has noticed the decline, and is doing something about it. He’s spearheading an effort to teach baseball and baseball history to kids in the inner cities so hopefully, that number will one day go back up. And I think the first step in raising that number is figuring out exactly what color Derek Jeter is.

Anyway, Torii and a bunch of other guys are kicking in $10,000 each to launch a nationwide Little League program, to get kids excited about baseball again. So I hope it works… and, you know, it’s not that I believe that a lack of black Americans in the majors is a huge problem that we as a society have an obligation to correct, but… promoting diversity is a good idea, getting more kids to learn about Jackie Robinson and the Negro Leagues is a good idea, and I compliment Torii Hunter for stepping up.

Between this, and his clubhouse naked time, he’s one of my favorite players.

You can go to this website, and I swear I’m not making this up, and move your mouse cursor over a foot that purports to be that of England striker Wayne Rooney, “in a rhythmic fashion to focus your positive healing energies and add to the Healometer grand total.”

See, the more you move your mouse over this thing, the higher the Healometer goes. Their target is 790,056m, and they currently have 137,716m. Unfortunately, there is no option to drive rusty spikes through his heal, but you never know… that could surface today. I contibuted my 2m, even though I suspect that Wayne Rooney’s actual foot is much more unslightly than the one pictured there. Not an attractive man, Wayne Rooney. His own foot is also probably bigger, and carrying some sort of fungus. And perhaps a tattoo.

Creative idea for a website. Gotta hand it to whoever did it. There’s something slightly gratifying about moving your mouse over Wayne’s foot, hearing the little bells, and watching your meter be added to the Healometer total. I think they’ll easily reach the goal of 790,056m… and I still think Wayne will still be sitting out the group stages.

The picture at the top, by the way, is Colleen McLoughlin, girlfriend of Wayne Rooney. I thought that might make this post a little more tolerable for the non-soccer fans.

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