Archive for June 13th, 2006

June13

Marveling At The Duke Support System

By: the mighty mjd

By now, certainly, you are aware of J.J. Redick’s DUI arrest. In fact, that may be the reason that you galloped around the office this morning, high-fiving everybody in your path. I wanted to mention it, though certainly no one’s going to have a better time with it than Deadspin had today.

The particulars: Redick spotted a checkpoint, and made an illegal U-turn to avoid it. He blew a 0.11, and the leagl limit is .08. That’s not Bob Probert territory or anything, but it’s drunk.

What amazes me is how quickly Duke University sprung into action. If you’re a college athlete, and you’re going to get a DUI… my hope for you is that you’re a Duke basketball player. Redick’s official statement was issued through Duke. And then Coach Mike Krzyzewski himself sprung into action, stopping himself just a second before he began comparing Redick to Gandhi and Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.:

“J.J. knows he made a mistake and regrets it. He represented the very best in college athletics and exhibited outstanding character at Duke the last four years. He is and will continue to be a credit to the Duke basketball family. As his friend and his coach, he has my total support.”

I’d imagine that the private conversation between Krzyzewski and his best pal Redick went a little differently, including a quote something like, “Hey asshole, I armed you for life, not for becoming the next Vin Baker. Who do I look like, Eddie fucking Sutton?”

Anyway, I’m not quite the Redick-hater that many, many, many, many, many, many others are… but I certainly don’t want to stand in the way of your enjoyment of this. Enjoy…

Posted in: College Hoops, Criminality, NBA5 comments

June13

Concrete Remains Undefeated

By: the mighty mjd

Steelers linebacker Joey Porter on motorcycles:

“If I fall off a Jet Ski, I hit the water, and I like my odds,” Porter said. “I’m going to get wet. What I say about motorcycles is that concrete is undefeated.”

And, quite unfortunately, concrete ran it’s all-time record up to 29,372,027,258-and-0. Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger suffered some pretty bad injuries yesterday after a motorcycle crash in Pittsburgh. I once said that after Jay Williams, and after Kellen Winslow, I’d have a hard time feeling sorry for anyone else who got hurt on a motorcycle. It was easy to say at the time, but, as it turns out, not true.

I feel terrible for the guy. I wish him nothing but the best. I don’t think he “deserves” it for not wearing a helmet, and I don’t think he “had it coming.” Of course, none of that stops me from thinking that refusing to wear a helmet is something done only by absolute fucking morons. I don’t begrudge him his motorcycle. A lot of guys in the NFL do a lot of dangerous things in the offseason. Some guys go skydiving. Some guys have cocaine habits. Matt Leinart has sex with Paris Hilton. All of them, if you’re irresponsible about it, can hurt you. Riding a motorcycle is something that you can do safely, keeping in mind that bad things can, and are perhaps more likely to happen. But regardless… put on a fucking helmet. It’s not a freedom issue, it’s not about anyone trying to control you, it’s not about the man keeping you down… it’s about 15,000 tramatic brain injuries a year suffered in motorcycle accidents.

It’s still kinda hard to tell how bad things are for him right now. I know that seven hours of facial surgery, however… is not a good thing. His hat may not fit right for a while. I guess the knee injuries aren’t that significant, but… I mean, if doctors are putting his face back together, it could be a while before they clear him for the kind of contact that the NFL brings. Doctor Jerome Bettis, though, says his injuries aren’t severe enough to limit anything he can do on the football field. Man law? Man law.

Best of luck, Large Benjamin. I’m rooting for your good health.

Posted in: NFL, Sad18 comments

June13

Grasping At Soccer Straws…

By: the mighty mjd

I’d like for someone to convince me that the United States isn’t completely fucked in the World Cup. I watched our game, and then I watched Ghana/Italy… and judging from yesterday’s performances, we’re not close to any of these teams. If we played Ghana yesterday, they’d have destroyed us. The United States is the Arizona Cardinals of Group E.

I’m just looking for reasons to believe here. Someone who knows more about soccer… please, if you can, give me a reason to believe that we can get the full three points against Italy. Maybe the Czechs were a bad matchup for us, because of their size and physical strength. Maybe we’ll do better against a more skill-oriented team like Italy. Or maybe we’ll find our confidence and grow up, and stop the practice of getting the ball across midfield, and then being like, “DERRRRR, here’s the ball, you ugly Czech fuck.” We avoided the box yesterday like we were A.C. Green.

Or, you know… maybe we just suck. I don’t think we’re as bad as we played yesterday, and I don’t think we’re kidding ourselves by saying that we can at least compete with a team like the Czechs. But I see very little reason to believe that we’re going to even get close to advancing out of our group. I would love to be convinced otherwise.

Posted in: Soccer13 comments

June13

Shaq Is A Quitter

By: the mighty mjd

Five shots in one game? Ridiculous. Shaq’s a dominant player. He should demand the ball, and shoot all the time. But he didn’t. He just quit on his team, because he’s selfish, and he has ulterior motives on the court, and he doesn’t care anything about winning. He took five shots in an NBA Finals game, and he’s a quitter and a loser.

Of course, that’s all absurd, and I don’t believe it. But I don’t think it’s any less fair to say those things about Shaq than it was to say them about Kobe Bryant after Game 7 of the Lakers/Suns series. I know that Kobe has a certain reputation that Shaq doesn’t, but… I feel like that’s why those things were said about Kobe’s performance at that time–his reputation, as opposed to, you know, anything that took place on the court. Maybe you feel like Kobe made some poor basketball decisions, and that’s fine. But as far as quitting, or anything else… if it’s fair for Kobe, I think it’s fair for Shaq, too.

Anyway, Game Three is tonight, and is, quite obviously, huge. I don’t think all the white-clad fans in the world can help the Heat. The only way they’re winning is if Dwyane Wade or Shaq (more likely Wade) goes off for about 40, and they pull out a close game. But I think the Mavs defense against Wade has been an overlooked factor in the series, too. They often have a lot of quickness out there on the floor, they help really well, and Dampier or Diop are usually around to help protect the rim. I dunno. Maybe it’s my own lack of imagination, but… I’m not seeing a lot of ways for the Heat to fight out of this hole.

Here’s Pat Riley and his attempt to motivate his team…

“Everybody’s written our team off,” Riley said of a playoff run that has gone stale more than once over the course of 19 games. “We lost two games to Chicago and then we got buried by New Jersey in the first game of that series. We were history then and we were history against Detroit. Even when were ahead 3-1, we were history.”

Most of that… is imaginary. I don’t recall anyone saying, “Hey, I don’t know if Miami can dig themselves out of this hole,” when they were up 3-1 against Detroit. I think it was pretty clear to everyone who watched even a game of that series that Miami was the better team, and couldn’t lose. And I don’t recall anyone thinking that the Vince Carter mountain was a little bit too much for the Heat to climb. Just reaching for any little thing…

Posted in: NBA10 comments

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