You ladies are why the Trim category exists.  Thank you.A couple of cheerleaders for the CFL’s Hamilton Tiger-Cats have been suspended from the squad after going on Howard Stern’s radio show. They were on the air talking about how they were virgins, their preferences for blow jobs, and they did some ho-dancing, evidently, and according to this article, they both “rode a sex toy.”

Joe Theismann had these comments:

“I don’t ever want to be mentioned in the same breath as these sex toy-riding cheerleaders ever again. I mean, they ride sex toys. Live on the air! I mean, I know my own son rides sex toys, too, but… that’s in the privacy of his own home, and the boy’s a Theismann, okay? He can do whatever the hell he wants, and if he wants to ride a motorized rubber ding-dong, then I’m damn sure going to let him. Fuckin’, I’ll pay for his batteries.

But these girls are a disgrace to the proud legacy of Canadian cheerleading, which is renowned all over the world. They don’t deserve to make human pyramids and carry megaphones. They should just go on with their lives, and blow anyone they want to. Blow Bryan Adams or Dexter Manley or the host of Fear Factor, I don’t care. Blow the plumber the next time he shows up at your house, right there on the kitchen floor if you feel like it. They obviously don’t want to cheer. Doesn’t anybody have any class anywhere?”

I made that up.

So yeah, they’re suspended. I can’t say for sure whether or not that suspension is just. I do, however, feel like it would be just to suspend or fire any woman who even believes that she can appear on Howard Stern’s show, and then not having something bad happen in her life. What positive outcomes are even possible?

I’m not a Stern fan, but… I know enough to know that no woman’s going to be on that show without being at least asked to talk about things that are… well… whorish. It’s what the man does, and apparently, there’s a huge audience for it. What are these girls expecting? That they’ll get on the show and share their grandmother’s recipe for Snickerdoodles? The Canadian Football League prides themselves on being a family-oriented enterprise… they don’t want their cheerleaders on the radio saying, “Hi! We cheer for the Hamilton Tiger-Cats and we’ve sucked more dicks than we can even count! GO TI-CATS!”

Comments

  • Wait, do you know a good recipe for Snickerdoodles? those things are yummy.

  • The best part of this post (and there were many good parts)? Yeah, “I made that up.”

  • Well, they’re hot, but they’re no Renee and Angela.

  • HuangKong

    goddamn, how is “cheerleaders riding sex toys” not a national sport???? screw cheerleading – put CRST on espn 8, the ocho, and i’d watch it all day long.

  • fredwilo

    This post just reminds me how much I hate Joe Theismann.

  • E

    Actually, I think they just talked about how much dong they had not actually sucked, like how they were big prudes

  • Moonshine Mike

    Cheerleaders Riding Sex Toys! The Finals! play by play with Marv Albert!

    yea, it needs to be on tv asap.

  • They both were riding the sex toy? Surely, there is an easy Fred Smoot joke in there.

  • There is an easy Fred Smoot joke “in there”. But don’t call me Shirley.

  • David

    I’m pretty sure there was never a mention of what team they cheered for either. What they actually did, I think, was a lot tamer than the way it sounds.

  • Bud

    I heard the broadcast. They were promoting a fitness competition and they only briefly mentioned they were cheerleaders in the CFL, no team mention.

    They were allot of fun to listen to on the show and their appearance made me want to check out the CFL.

  • Total Joke

    Hey not that it really matters, but I can pretty much guarantee you that at least one of them was completely lying about being a virgin.

    Anyone who goes on the howard stern show and doesnt think it will get them in trouble is an idiot and deserves to be suspended from a family-friendly association.

    It sounds unrealistic to normal people, but I actually think they were just too dumb to think about the consequences.

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