A few days ago, I said of Maurice Clarett’s arrest/depression/confusion/arsenal, that it was “the most bizarre and surreal sports story since OJ Simpson.” I’m going to have to take that back now, because Clarett now has been linked with the Isreali Mob. Yep. Isreali Mob.
At this point, hey, why the fuck not? If police said tomorrow that a magic beanstalk was growing out of Clarett’s urethra, I’d just shrug and say, “Well, that’s unusual.” I mean, when a guy is arrested outside of a pancake house with four guns, a bottle of the Goose, a bulletproof vest, a hatchet and a lint roller, is anything really out of bounds? Isreali mob ties almost seem like the natural next step in the progression.
The guy’s name is Hai Waknine, and he, according to this report, was the one providing Clarett with the cars, home, and bodyguards while he was busy letting his talents erode before the NFL combine. His lawyer speculates that the threatening note that Clarett recently received came from Waknine and/or his people, which seems like a reasonable connection to draw. And it’s becoming more and more clear that jail right now is the absolute best place for Maurice Clarett. Had he not been arrested when he was, Waknine and his people would be going after him like he was a member of Hezbollah.
Tom Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 7:04 am
Israeli.
Mark Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 8:15 am
Frankly, I’m quite disappointed that the Israeli mob doesn’t have better things to be doing than funding Maurice Clarett.
I mean, seriously guys, funding Maurice Clarett? You could so much more easily bribe our government or something.
Unsilent Majority Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 10:44 am
jack abramoff is such a dick.
New York Sports Page Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 11:01 am
Even the postcards seem to cinematic to be real. Who the hell sends postcards in an era of drive-by shootings?
From Youngstown to the Israeli mafia. Someone better write a hell of a book about this.
WBRS Sports Blog Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 11:20 am
How is it that this story somehow gets better each and every day?
tony Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 11:42 am
From Youngstown to the Israeli mafia. Someone better write a hell of a book about this.
Actually, the only amazing thing about this is that it was the Israeli mob that got to him before the Italian mob that runs Youngstown did.
The question is, who’s the dummy here? The 20-year old kid that got started dealing with the mob? Or the mob boss that thought “60% of Clarett’s rookie contract” was going to be anything more than half a bag of Cheetos and a case of Mountain Dew?
hkuszak Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 12:29 pm
he had a fucking lint roller? damn, that’s hard.
Fan's Attic Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 12:41 pm
what exactly is the racket of the Israeli mob? is it just like the italian one or do they deal in dredels and yarmulkes?
New York Sports Page Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 1:09 pm
They’re pretty much just like the Italian mafia, except they run more operations in the Third World.
Fan's Attic Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 2:34 pm
NYSP: i like that article, Israeli mob just like Italian mob but a lot smarter.
Moonshine Mike Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 4:05 pm
better access to bagels and rye bread.
and think of the pastrami and corned beef they’d hook you up with.
WBRS Sports Blog Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 5:52 pm
But what if you disobeyed them? Would they force feed you gefilte fish until you threw up? Would that be their way of punishing those which pissed them off?
The Big Picture Says:
August 18th, 2006 at 6:12 pm
the beanstalk will come next week.
Mark Says:
August 19th, 2006 at 11:19 am
If the Israeli Mafia knew how much we were making fun of them on this site, they’d probably start sending all of us death threats.
If they could throw a bagel in with the death threat though, that would be wonderful.