A few days ago, I said of Maurice Clarett’s arrest/depression/confusion/arsenal, that it was “the most bizarre and surreal sports story since OJ Simpson.” I’m going to have to take that back now, because Clarett now has been linked with the Isreali Mob. Yep. Isreali Mob.
At this point, hey, why the fuck not? If police said tomorrow that a magic beanstalk was growing out of Clarett’s urethra, I’d just shrug and say, “Well, that’s unusual.” I mean, when a guy is arrested outside of a pancake house with four guns, a bottle of the Goose, a bulletproof vest, a hatchet and a lint roller, is anything really out of bounds? Isreali mob ties almost seem like the natural next step in the progression.
The guy’s name is Hai Waknine, and he, according to this report, was the one providing Clarett with the cars, home, and bodyguards while he was busy letting his talents erode before the NFL combine. His lawyer speculates that the threatening note that Clarett recently received came from Waknine and/or his people, which seems like a reasonable connection to draw. And it’s becoming more and more clear that jail right now is the absolute best place for Maurice Clarett. Had he not been arrested when he was, Waknine and his people would be going after him like he was a member of Hezbollah.
Tom
Israeli.
August 18, 2006 at 7:04 am
Mark
Frankly, I’m quite disappointed that the Israeli mob doesn’t have better things to be doing than funding Maurice Clarett.
I mean, seriously guys, funding Maurice Clarett? You could so much more easily bribe our government or something.
August 18, 2006 at 8:15 am
Unsilent Majority
jack abramoff is such a dick.
August 18, 2006 at 10:44 am
New York Sports Page
Even the postcards seem to cinematic to be real. Who the hell sends postcards in an era of drive-by shootings?
From Youngstown to the Israeli mafia. Someone better write a hell of a book about this.
August 18, 2006 at 11:01 am
WBRS Sports Blog
How is it that this story somehow gets better each and every day?
August 18, 2006 at 11:20 am
tony
From Youngstown to the Israeli mafia. Someone better write a hell of a book about this.
Actually, the only amazing thing about this is that it was the Israeli mob that got to him before the Italian mob that runs Youngstown did.
The question is, who’s the dummy here? The 20-year old kid that got started dealing with the mob? Or the mob boss that thought “60% of Clarett’s rookie contract” was going to be anything more than half a bag of Cheetos and a case of Mountain Dew?
August 18, 2006 at 11:42 am
hkuszak
he had a fucking lint roller? damn, that’s hard.
August 18, 2006 at 12:29 pm
Fan's Attic
what exactly is the racket of the Israeli mob? is it just like the italian one or do they deal in dredels and yarmulkes?
August 18, 2006 at 12:41 pm
New York Sports Page
They’re pretty much just like the Italian mafia, except they run more operations in the Third World.
August 18, 2006 at 1:09 pm
Fan's Attic
NYSP: i like that article, Israeli mob just like Italian mob but a lot smarter.
August 18, 2006 at 2:34 pm
Moonshine Mike
better access to bagels and rye bread.
and think of the pastrami and corned beef they’d hook you up with.
August 18, 2006 at 4:05 pm
WBRS Sports Blog
But what if you disobeyed them? Would they force feed you gefilte fish until you threw up? Would that be their way of punishing those which pissed them off?
August 18, 2006 at 5:52 pm
The Big Picture
the beanstalk will come next week.
August 18, 2006 at 6:12 pm
Mark
If the Israeli Mafia knew how much we were making fun of them on this site, they’d probably start sending all of us death threats.
If they could throw a bagel in with the death threat though, that would be wonderful.
August 19, 2006 at 11:19 am