I saw this yesterday morning on Deadspin, and I really can’t believe it’s not getting more attention know. I mean, it’s not everyday that Latrell Sprewell gets in trouble for choking someone. Okay, that happens. But when he grabbed P.J. Carlesimo’s neck, it wasn’t during sex. I don’t think so, anyway, but there may have been some sexual tension in the air. You know how basketball practice can be.
In this brand new Sprewell choking incident, however, the choking is alleged to have gone on during sex. A woman is accusing Latrell Sprewell of choking her while they were doing the hibbity-dibbity on his boat, Milwaukee’s Best. Well, of course it was on his boat named Milwaukee’s Best. Where else are you going to choke a woman? She complained to police, they noticed red marks on her neck, and they’re investigating. Carlesimo may end up be a character witness in this thing.
I can’t relate here. What is he, shooting a snuff film? There are people I want to have sex with, and there are people I want to choke. In very few instances are they the same people. And even if they are, I don’t know if I’d want to do both at the same time. Ann Coulter may be the lone exception.
Not to undermine the seriousness of the allegations, but … when you tell Latrell Sprewell that you’ll have sex with him on his boat named Milwaukee’s Best … I mean, what good is going to come from that? He’s not in the NBA anymore. Fucking him on his boat named Milwaukee’s Best isn’t going to get you good tickets to the next game, it’s not going to get you into the nice hotels, and clubs, and parties. It’s just going to get you choked.
insomniac
You haven’t had a chick ask you to choke her during sex? I guess you need to ask out the waitress in the Raiders jersey next time you’re doing the smorgasboard. I’m sure she’d be into that sorta thing.
August 31, 2006 at 1:52 am
Jay Miller
If you ever get to fuck Ann Coulter, let me know how big her cock actually is.
August 31, 2006 at 3:50 am
The Big Picture
don’t tell me spree drinks milwaukee’s best. he’s more of a keystone ice kinda guy.
August 31, 2006 at 4:25 am
Mark
You’re surprised that this story isn’t getting more air time, MJD? Really? Did you check the headline again and see that it’s Latrell Sprewell who’s in trouble?
I seriously can’t think of one GOOD thing that the man has ever done to attract media attention. Someone probably pulled this story off a news wire, saw the name “Latrell Sprewell,” and the word “accused,” and threw it out. Old news, no story.
When Latrell lands in jail for life…I’ll read that story.
August 31, 2006 at 8:57 am
Suss
Mark, buddy, you’re missing the big picture here.
Sprewell. Choking. Sex. Boat named Milwaukee’s Best. Rarely do any of us get one of those four on any given night.
August 31, 2006 at 10:07 am
JDepp
Ann Coulter….and don’t forget Paris Hilton
August 31, 2006 at 10:44 am
mc
Wasn’t Spree the guy who stopped playing because he couldn’t get enough money to feed his wife and kids?
August 31, 2006 at 3:30 pm
Nikki
I can’t read the story, fix the picture!
August 31, 2006 at 4:21 pm
the mighty mjd
Fuck. I’m sorry about that.
September 1, 2006 at 12:42 am
Nikki
Not a problem~ Being a wolves fan, I couldn’t wait to read about the one we let get away…
September 1, 2006 at 1:38 pm