Stephon Marbury, since he already has basketball mastered, is expanding his horizons and getting into the TV game. He’s supposedly got a new talk show out there, and has already filmed a few demo shows, and is now just looking for someone to pick it up.

The first interview he did with an hour-long sitdown with Kobe Bryant, and Stephon is particularly proud of it. And I made a few phone calls and was lucky enough to get a tape. I transcribed the interview for you, and it’s here, exclusively on themightymjd.com. Enjoy.

Starbury: So, Kobe, did you see my game last night? I had 35 points.
Kobe: Cool. Did you win?
Starbury: I said I had 35 points.
Kobe: Well, yeah, I heard you… but I mean, did the Knicks win?
Starbury: I’m not sure, actually.
Kobe: Oh.
Starbury: Hey, have you tried my new shoes? They’re kind of cool.
Kobe: No, I’ve got this deal with Nike, I can’t of kind wear anything else.
Starbury: I’m doing something really nice for the kids out there who can’t afford Nike shoes.
Kobe: I think that’s great, man.
Starbury: And you’re kinda not, since your shoes are so expensive.
Kobe: (silence)
Starbury: Don’t you think that’s nice of me?
Kobe: Yeah. Yeah, that’s great.
Starbury: Say I’m nice.
Kobe: What?
Starbury: Say I’m nice. Come on, say it.
Kobe: I don’t think I’m going to say that.
Starbury: Okay, it’s cool. Everyone knows anyway.
Kobe: If you say so.
Starbury: Hey, did you know that Larry Brown was a total dick and that he told my kids that God hates all Canadians, and that he threw a knife at my wife’s face and–
Kobe: Look, man. Do you think we could talk about something other than you?
Starbury: Yeah. Well, I mean, I don’t know why we would, but if you want to…
Kobe: Alright, good.
Starbury: So… (look at his watch) Shooting the basketball is fun, isn’t it?
Kobe: Yes. I like the shooting the basketball.
Starbury: Me too.
Kobe: Yep.
Starbury: So, um… dribbling it is alright, too.
Kobe: Yeah. Sometimes, it can be.
Starbury: Yeah.
Kobe: (nods)
Starbury: So, let’s talk about you some more, since, you know, you’re too important to talk about anyone else. On a scale of 9.8 to 10, how great would you say that I am?
Kobe: See, that’s about you again.
Starbury: No, man, I asked you what you thought.
Kobe: I’m out of here.
Starbury: Cool, seeya, man. We’ll be back with more me on the Me Me Me show, right after this.