Jack Wagner, who used to be an actor, rolled in a 12-foot birdie putt on the 18th hole to win the American Century Celebrity Golf Championship. In doing so, he became the first non-professional athlete to win the thing. This was his reaction.

“I’ve choked, thrown it away down the stretch several times. I’m speechless,” he said. “This is a dream come true. I’ve worked so hard for this.”

I thought it was just a bunch of celebrities out there, getting drunk, signing autographs, having a good time. I didn’t know that winning a celebrity golf tournament was anything that someone would ever describe as “a dream come true.” But I suppose Jack Wagner gave up acting a long time ago (his last movie role was the 2003 made-for-TV hit “Ghost Dog: A Detective Tail”), so I guess he has all new goals now. Good for him.

The worst celebrity golfer in the field? Charles Barkley. Well, that’s if you don’t count Lou Holtz, who withdrew. And the tournament uses the modified Stableford scoring system, presumably to save guys like Barkley some embarrassment. Sir Charles pocketed $775.50 for his last place finish, which probably does not cover his bar tab this evening.

Among those were are better golfers than Charles Barkley: Chris Webber, LaDainian Tomlinson, Anthony Anderson (who played today in a kilt), Cheech Marin, Stone Phillips, Brandi Chastain, and Digger Phelps.

A 15-year-old boy named Tadd Fujikawa will be among the field at the U.S. Open this year at Winged Foot. He’s about 5’1″ and hits the driver about 285. This is insane… where are all these amazing teenage golfers coming from? Sometime soon, a kid is going to break par at a PGA Tour immediately after spending a weekend at the Neverland Ranch. At 15, my golf career was in a slightly different place, as I still thought it was hilarious to jab a playing partner in the ass with the flagstick. My game has failed to evolve since then.

Anyway, I think it will be interesting to see how much teeth-gnashing goes on about this young man’s future. He’s male, Michelle Wie is female. And that will absolutely make a difference in how people look at it. And yes, I know that no one in the media is going to make a particularly big note about it, at least not on anything near a Wie-level, because he’s not Wie. He’s an unknown Hawaiian kid who no one’s ever heard of. But I’d bet that we’re not going to hear one word about how any of this is bad for him. Not a word. He’ll be just a cute kid and an amusing novelty, not someone with suspect parents that are pushing him into something for which he is not ready.

Tadd played in a sectional tournament like the one Michelle Wie played in, only Michelle had to finish in the top 18 out of 153, and this kid had to finish first among a field of 10. He did. In the qualifying round (which qualifies players for the sectionals), Wie did play with Tadd… and finished ahead of him. But she opted for the sectional in New Jersey, as opposed to this one in Hawaii, because she’s playing in the LPGA Championship in Baltimore this week.

Anyway, I want you to know that this is it for the week on teenage golfers. I imagine that this does not make you sad.

She was -2 with nine holes to play. I thought she had a legitimate chance to make it happen. I was pulling for her. But then she choked like a… well, seeing that she’s a 16-year-old girl, it’s probably best to leave the imagery out of it. So, let’s say she faltered down the stretch. I think that’s fair. And appropriate.

So, despite disagreeing with Adrian Wojnarowski’s contention yesterday that her father is wronging her by allowing her to even try to play in the US Open, I would wholeheartedly agree, and have in the past, that Michelle Wie needs to learn how to win against her own competition first. Learning how to play great golf, and learning how to close out a tournament, or even a round, aren’t the same things. It’s not the first time Michelle Wie has come up slightly short in a clutch situation. And that will come with time. Hey, it happened for Dirk Nowitzki.

Had she qualified, though, the task awaiting her at the U.S. Open would’ve been monumental. The USGA likes the set up their U.S. Open courses to be not challenging, not difficulting, and not demanding… but completely fucking unfair. I was thinking about that today. Asking a 16-year-old to play Winged Foot, set up to U.S. Open specifications… at the very least, it would be humbling.

Anyway, it doesn’t matter. She didn’t make it. And, obviously, I’m not ssuggesting she should stop playing these men’s events. There’s something to be learned there, too, and I don’t blame her for wanting to do it. But she’s got to learn how to win, and how to finish things off. I’d like to see that happen at some point.

Michelle Wie attempts to qualify for the U.S. Open today. It’s a 36-hole event. If she finishes in the Top 18 of the 153-person field, she’s in. ESPN.com’s Adrian Wojnarowski says it’s too soon for all of this. A snippet…

Wie keeps cutting an unprecedented path because her talent allows for it. When that replaces common sense and good judgment as the barometer, you’re throwing a young athlete into harm’s way

The golf isn’t going to be the problem for Wie. It’s everything else around it, beginning Monday morning with a carnival at Canoe Brook Country Club, a sectional qualifier to get her to the U.S. Open at Winged Foot. If she were to get there, and it’s a big if, what a spectacle of epic sporting proportion that would be.

Great for golf, I guess. For a 16-year-old, don’t be so sure. Pass or fail, what will assuredly come with all of this for her is a resentment on the men’s and women’s tours, two worlds of pros that will be slow to embrace her. That’s life. That’s human nature. And that happens with the prodigies in everything, but to expose her to all of this now, asking Michelle Wie to take on what will come with success and failure now, is sure asking a lot. And for what?

This is a hell of a burden for the biggest and best golf’s ever developed — let alone a kid still waiting to get her driver’s license.

It’s certainly fair to question it, and I’m not saying that Wojnarowski is wrong, or that I disagree with him. I just don’t know the answer. I don’t think there is one. No one’s ever been in those shoes before. And while I understand the questions, I think it’s awfully presumptuous for anyone to put themselves in BJ Wie’s position and say definitively, “Yes, I know the right thing to do here, and you are wrong.”

I’ve never really seen any signs that Michelle Wie is an ill-adjusted kid. Yeah, it would be a lot to ask of her to take on the pressure of either pro tour, and possible resentment of other pros (which I don’t think would be that bad). But she’s had to handle a lot of things already, and she’s done it. She seems like her head is screwed on right. And if her parents have done a good job in all other areas of her life, and they’re going to continue to do so through the whole thing… hey, there’s always a first person to do something, and it’s never easy for any of them.

The man largely responsible for the dominant force that is Tiger Woods has passed away. Earl Woods, Tiger’s dad… has been having major health problems for the last few years. Earl Woods succumbed to cancer this afternoon, a cancer he’d been battling for 8 years.

This is not a man who is lacking in contributions to the world. Anything Tiger does, particularly off the course, owes quite a bit to Earl Woods and how he chose to raise his son.

An excellent read on Earl Woods here, from Golf Digest. Condolences.

After yesterday’s revelations that Daly’s gambling makes Michael Jordan look like a little bitch, this thorough AP article finds some more gems from Daly’s book. I think a bulleted list is in order…

• He was disqualified from a junior tournament when a bottle of whiskey was found in his bag.

• In college, he had to lose 60 pounds to be on the golf team. So he went on a whiskey/cigarettes/popcorn diet that sent him to the emergency room. But he did lose the 60 pounds.

• His father, in a drunken rage, once held a gun to his head.

• He named his second daughter after a rehab center.

Goodness gracious.

In a new book that’s coming out next week, John Daly discloses that he’s lost between $50 and $60 million in his life through gambling. That’s… Goodness gracious. That’s a “holy fuck” kind of a number. His gambling problem appears to be not only addiction, but he also seems to be a really, really bad gambler.

In one episode, he won $750,000 for his finish in the World Golf Championship… then drove immediately to Vegas and lost $1.65 million in five hours. The most bizarre part of the story, at least to me, is that he lost that much playing $5,000 slot machines… which aren’t even fun. To each his own, I guess, but… if you’re going to lose that much lumber, at least make it enjoyable. At least do more than pull a lever. Some blackjack, some craps, some poker… I dunno. That might just be me.

There are other stories just like one in the article. It’s really just staggering… I can’t relate. And this, which frightens the hell out of me, is his plan for the future:

He said he plans to start at the $25 slots in the casinos and set a “walkout loss number,” which would tell him it’s time to leave.

“If I make a little bit, then maybe I move up to the $100 slots or the $500 slots, or maybe I take it to the blackjack table,” he wrote. “It’s their money. Why not give it a shot, try to double it? And if I make a lot, I can…

“Well, that’s my plan.”

I think that’s a very bad plan. I’ve got a better plan, I think: stay the hell out of the casino. Walkout loss numbers are good, but… you can’t finish the sentence without talking about upping your bets and trying to double your money. That’s a pretty good sign that you don’t have a handle on this problem. It’s like a heroin user saying, “You know, I think I’ll just shoot up a little bit.”

Don’t get me wrong, I realize that it’s not as easy as just stayout out of the casino. The man is clearly the all-time heavyweight champion of addictive personalities. While talking to former Cowboys linebacker Hollywood Henderson in rehab for drinking, Hollywood told Daly to be careful, because he’d find something sooner or later that he loved as much as drinking. It’s gambling… and, you know, if it goes too far with gambling, you don’t start shaking and need help walking off the green. You get Joe Pesci clamping your head in a vice.

I really wish the best for John Daly… some major therapy is in order here. PGA Tour commissioner Tim Finchem has offered the help and support of the Tour, and I hope they can do something for the guy.

It’s not fair to Phil Mickelson to say it, but… he’s kind of lost his charm since he won the Masters in 2004. I’ve never found anything particularly likable about him… at least back then, he was a lovable loser. Now, he’s just a polite guy with a smile he can manufacture at any second. I dunno. I wasn’t rooting against him or anything, but almost anyone else winning would’ve made for a more interesting day.

He was impressive, though. No bogeys until 18… on a Sunday at The Masters, when the greens are dry and the course is longer than it’s ever been, that’s pretty fucking amazing. It’s too bad that such an outstanding performance didn’t have a serious challenger to put a little more shine on it.

Between the NCAA tournament and the Masters, though, I gotta tell ya… I am fucking tired of Jim Nantz. If I end up in hell, Jim Nantz will be following me around through the flames jabbering in my ear about a tradition unlike any other. I hate him.