I get about half of what Bode Miller has been saying. I understand that there can be great performances that don’t result in gold medals or world championships and wins. I get that. I get that you have to live for your own expectations, and not those of other people. I get that winning and losing isn’t always everything.

But there are things I don’t get. I don’t get why it’s okay to come to the Olympics and not try your hardest to win. I don’t get why you wouldn’t train as hard as you possibly could. I don’t get why it’s a bigger goal to party with a positively frightening woman and socialize “at an Olympic level” than it is to actually put forth your best performance. I don’t get why it’s OK to take a spot on the Olympic team from someone who would’ve taken it seriously and who would’ve tried their hardest.

When you have the talent to be the best, then it is about winning. To say it isn’t is to completely cop out, to make excuses for why you don’t have to make that commitment. Bode Miller is not the Jamaican bobsled team. He’s one of the best in the world. It shouldn’t be about just being here. I believe he does have an obligation to try and win. It’s not enough to go out and “rock.” If he can’t take having that responsibility, he should quit. Give the spot to someone who will give an honest effort. Give it to someone who believes the Olympics are more than about partying.

We watch sports because we want to see winners and losers. These sports exist because we watch with the assumption that we’re going to see who’s the best. And when someone goes out there without having prepared to the best of their ability, we don’t see that. When someone goes out there who just wants to “rock,” we don’t get that. Ultimately, as sports fans, we’re sold something that we aren’t getting.

Hey, I don’t care that he didn’t win. Lots of people didn’t win. Even with all the commercials, all the headlines, the 60 Minutes, the magazine covers, etc… if he goes over there and busts his ass, and someone was better… that’s fine. I didn’t think poorly of Dan O’Brien when Reebok’s Dan and Dave campaign went bust. But I do think poorly of Bode Miller for treating the Olympics as if they were just an opportunity for him to make some Nike money and have a good time.

Bronze: Chad Hedrick.

Silver: Shani Davis.

Gold: Italian guy named Enrico Fabris.

Bode Miller is now 0-for-the Olympics, failing to medal in his 4th event. He’s only got one left, and it’s said to be his weakest event, which is kind of hard to imagine. He finished sixth in the giant slalom, which, don’t get me wrong, makes him a pretty bad motherfucker. But if you’re going to make yourself a human headline machine, it’d be nice if you bothered to win a medal on the world’s biggest stage.

“One of the good things about my career is I have such extensive knowledge, so I always go as hard as I can. Some guys can go 70-80 percent and get results, but I wouldn’t do that. If things went well, I could be sitting on four medals, maybe all of them gold.”

You know, if things went well for Scott Norwood, he’d be a Super Bowl champion right now. If things went well for Craigh Ehlo, Michael Jordan wouldn’t have buried a jumper in his grill. A lot of things could’ve gone a lot of ways… but you’ve had four chances at it, chief, and not once has it gone well.

I’m trying to understand the guy, but I’m just not getting it. I don’t understand the part about not being disappointed when you lose. He says things like, oh, kids shouldn’t get down on themselves for not winning, for not being the best, it’s all about fulfilling their potential… and I get that. That’s great. But then he goes out, clearly comes up way short of his potential, and that’s okay?

I don’t get it. I’d like to like the guy, but I can’t… maybe one of you who has joined Bode can help explain things to me. But for now, I’m not going to Join Bode. But Bode can feel free join me in the Guys Who Didn’t Win Medals In Torino Club, as I suspect he will when he fails to medal in his 5th and final event.

There’s just no good way for me to do this. By the time I blog about someone winning a medal, like… 12 hours have passed, and, chances are, being the internet-savvy bastard that you are, you’ve known about it for quite some time. But I’m going to pretend like none of that has happened.

Joey Cheek is a stud. I hope he gets major, major media attention in the coming days. American gold medal winners are awarded $25,000 from the USOC, and Cheek, after having won gold in the 500m speedskating, is giving all of it, every single penny, to refugees in Darfur.

I caught some curling yesterday, and I gotta tell ya… curling makes the Nordic Combined look like a perfectly natural and reasonable sport. I don’t know who dreamed this thing up. Someone, somewhere, said to themselves… “It would be cool if there were a long patch of ice, and we created some ridiculous thing that looked like a a couple of woks welded together with a handle glued on top, and a we pushed it down the ice and had a couple of dudes running in front of it, each of them furiously manipulating their Swiffer WetJet, and they swept in front of the ice and tried to knock the other guy’s wok contraption of a couple of big blue circles, which were painted on the ice earlier.” I don’t understand it, I don’t know why it exists… but as I’ve said, once every four years, I can get behind it. Especially the young American curling sisters pictured above, who can certainly curl my toes anytime.

Also, Hannah Teter and Gretchen Bleiler took gold and silver for America in the women’s halfpipe. Hannah Teter is my second favorite X Games athlete of all time, with #1 being Roach from Next Friday. To tell you the truth, the X Games people are some of the most likable people at the Olympics. Shaun White just seems like a down-to-earth and fun guy.

I’ve got this idea in the back of my head that, with all the sex going on in the Olympic Village… that somehow, somewhere, the paths of Shaun White and Grandma Luge will cross, and we will have a modern-day Harold and Maude story. That would be the greatest story to ever occur in Olympic history.

Join Bode? Okay, where? Oh, you’ll be the guy not standing on the medal podium? Alright, cool, I’ll join you there.

I guess that’s a little harsh, but for someone who made that much noise before the Olympics, I was expecting a little more. And there are other events left for him, sure, but the downhill is the big one. If you want to talk about skiing drunk, if you want to call Lance Armstrong and Barry Bonds cheaters, fine… but you should probably be able to do a little something yourself. Congratulations on 5th.

The guy who won, actually, is a pretty cool story. Frenchy Antoine Deneriaz was a non-story. Just some random anonymous guy that usually shows up to the Olympics, runs his race, finishes nowhere near the top, enjoys two weeks of constant sex the most physically fit women in the world, and goes home. He was 38th in the World Cup standings, hadn’t finished better than 7th all season, was racing down a messed-up track, and has his knee all torn up just 13 months ago. But he put together a perfect run. Nice work, Frenchy.

Snowboarder Shaun “The Flying Tomato” White won the gold in the men’s halfpipe, despite having one of the goofiest nicknames of all time. He actually didn’t quite dominate like he was expected to – he had to come from behind to get the gold.

As you may know, I’m not into the X-Games stuff. But it’s the Olympics. If it’s just once every four years, I can cheer for damn near anything. I’m not into the Nordic Combined, either, but I watched the whole fucking thing on Saturday… so I can deal with some snowboarding.  I’m so into it, I’m considering drinking some fucking Mountain Dew.  I am that extreme.
The women’s halfpipe is tonight, and will likely be an American sweep.

What the fuck, Italy?  Apparently, the entertainment for the Opening Ceremonies was provided by Club Vandersexxx. I mean, hey, do your thing, Italy… but some of this was just fucking weird.