Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

I’ve seen it talked about in a number of places recently. That Mark McGwire is a baseball pariah because of the perception that he used steroids, while “no one cares” that Shawne Merriman was framed busted for steroids. And maybe this is coming from a personal place, and not a particularly objective place, but I don’t see it. I don’t see the evidence that “no one cares” about Merriman’s steroid use. What I don’t see is this:

ROYALS ALL-STAR Mike Sweeney saw the recent Hall of Fame voting results and made a good point.

“It breaks my heart that a guy like [Mark] McGwire has been persecuted for something he never tested positive for or never admitted to,” Sweeney told the Kansas City Star, “yet there are guys playing on Sundays in the NFL that tested positive and people just seem to cover that up.”

He probably meant ignore rather than cover up. Still, his argument is a good one. Shawne Merriman led the NFL in sacks with 17. Maybe he would have had more if he didn’t have to sit out four games because of a steroid suspension.

Or maybe he wouldn’t have gotten to 17 without the juice. Merriman finished third in defensive player of the year voting and will be in uniform for the Chargers playoff game on Sunday.

McGwire? His reputation is slightly south of a snake’s belly.

Merriman did sit out, chief. Barry Bonds ever have to sit out a game?

Where are these people? Where are these people that completely accept steroid use in football? Where are these people that see Shawne Merriman and say, “Hey, that guy’s fast!” with no mention of steroids? I don’t think these people exist. I’ve never met one … and believe, I would damn sure like to.

I can’t watch 10 seconds of a Chargers game without some dickhead friend of mine injecting his ass with an air-syringe. I called a friend the other day to talk about Junior Seau’s being accused of some not-so-nice things, and he stretched himself out for some kind of “What, did he take a bunch of steroids like all San Diego linebackers?” joke. I was embarrassed for him, and then I had to insult his mother. You think I enjoyed that? You think I enjoyed telling this guy that I’m going to have to spend a week-and-a-half washing his mother’s feta-cheese stench off of me?

You’ll find people on both sides of the Mark McGwire/HOF debate, while I’ve found almost no one but myself on my side of the Shawne Merriman/Postseason Awards debate … which is odd, because it’s pretty much the exact same argument.

My point is that I think people do care about Merriman’s positive pee-pee test. And I’m not complaining about that, I would absolutely expect them to care … and the second I heard about it, I could glimpse the years and years of abuse for which I had just signed up.

But the “people care about McGwire, but don’t care about Merriman” thing … well, I think someone made that up. I don’t see any evidence of it. A first-time positive test in baseball gets someone suspended for 50 games. 30.9% of the season. A first-time positive in football gets a guy 4 games. 25% of the season. Ooooh, big difference.

What it is, I believe, is a sneaky little way for the learned, cultured, refined baseball fans of the world to cast stones at the illiterate meathead football fans of the word. “Hey, we care about this horrible tragedy, and you don’t. It’s really a shame that football fans are such simple-minded, paste-eating dolts, while our noble hearts bleed.”

Garbage.

There’s a Week 17 Smorgasbord.

Also, if I can wake up in six hours or so, I’ll be live blogging the Gator Bowl over at the FanHouse, if any of you happen to be interested.

Also, Happy New Year. Nice to see you crazy kids again.

…is available.

Is available here.

The Miami commentator certainly doesn’t need any convincing that this brawl was good for Miami… and of course, it’s bizarre and wildly irresponsible for a commentator to suggest that a brawl that involves the swinging of helmets and stomping players while they’re down can be construed in any way as a good thing.

The play-by-play guy is talking, and describing what’s happening until the other guy jumps in and starts talking like Ray Lewis outside of a nightclub before the Super Bowl. At that point, the play-by-play just seems bewildered and is like, “Alright, fuck it, then. You talk.”

But you know… maybe that guy’s right. Maybe all the fans that were screaming and holding up the ‘U’s are right. A week or two ago, I was telling people that Miami’s next head coach should be Dennis Erickson. Miami had lost its swagger… the guys on the 7th Floor hadn’t been able to get any pussy for months. Maybe Miami has to choose between a Dennis Erickson lifestyle, scaring the hell out of people, and winning every game by 40… or a Larry Coker lifestyle, with only two or three arrests per year, and an 8-3 record. Maybe it’s one or the other.

I know there are clean teams out there that can also win… but Miami’s just not one of them. It’s not in their nature. It’s like asking Andrew Dice Clay to do a 60-minute set and make people laugh without making any sex jokes. Some things just aren’t meant to be.

So hey, maybe this was a good thing… not for college athletics, FIU, the Florida legal system, or any sense of public decorum, but for Miami. For ‘The U.’ Maybe they had to go out there and say, “Yeah, we might suck this year… but we’re still the motherfuckers who will beat you with our helmet and put the cleats to you when you’re lying on the ground.” Maybe this was the first step towards setting a new tone in the post-Coker era (which is certainly coming).

And speaking of the stomping… that was #19 Brandon Meriweather’s proudest moment since this play.

In case you’re interested, I live-blogged the fuck out of last night’s Saints/Falcons game, and then wrote about Tony Kornheiser’s performance. You can find them both here.

The Sunday Afternoon Smorgasbord

It has returned.

And I’ll get the old ones imported over and get comments going and stuff, when I have time. So, you know… never.

Remember that play on Sunday when Donovan McNabb got a Texans safety to bite on a playfake like Randy Savage into a Slim Jim? Check out Andy Reid right before that happened, telling his assistants (or someone) to “watch this.”

That had to feel good.

Many thanks to Enrico Campitelli Jr. of eagles.aolsportsblog.com for hooking up the video.

There may have actually been a Steelers logo on the hood of the hearse.

This is the funeral procession for the recently-deceased Mayor of Pittsburgh. The woman highlighted on the right there has an unusual way of expressing her grief.

But you know, that’s what happens when a guy dies so close to the season opener against the Dolphins. In fact, I’m surprised that they don’t have those little plastic Steeler flags flying from the windows of the hearse. Did a “Here We Go, Steelers, Here We Go!” chant break out at the funeral?

Many thanks to my man Keith at PittPantherHoops.com for the tip.

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