5
November
Imagine you’re the kind of person who loves “Murder, She Wrote”, “A Prairie Home Companion” and various programs on the Oxygen network. Now, imagine someone makes you sit in front of an NFL pre-game show on Sunday at noon. It would be understandable if you thought that show was the worst, most obnoxious, over-produced, self-important [...]
29
October
I’d like to talk to you about something that’s become an epidemic. Sports bars, in staggering numbers around this grand nation of ours, are not paying attention to what’s on their televisions. Come on. That’s what makes you a sports bar. You know what games are on; you know what your patrons want to watch. [...]
1
January
Michael Irvin’s made an interesting choice with his wardrobe today. He took a normal suit, smeared it with melted chocolate, and then rolled through a forest on his way to the studio this morning. Just a bizarre look. I mean, you can get creative with the color and the cut of your suits… but that’s [...]
18
December
The crew of the CBS pregame show is kicking around the question of whether or not his breakup with Bridget Moynahan affected Tom Brady’s play last week. Since they broke up weeks ago, I tend to doubt it. And even if they had broken up that morning… you know, just fuck the CBS studio crew. [...]
11
December
I don’t know if they do this every week, but Fox’s pre-game show likes to send Pam Oliver out to do interviews with a particular team, and the general tone of the Pam Oliver interviews I’ve seen is something like, “Hey… you suck. Tell me why, asshole.” She’s downright mean sometimes. If she tried that [...]
4
December
Sign in the background for the Fox pregame outside of Giants Stadium: “IT’S ALL A-ROD’S FAULT.” I’m not sure if that guy’s trying to be funny, or if he actually thinks that’s true. The Bills/Chargers game is underway, and the Bills won the toss and elected to receive. The opening kickoff is taken by a [...]
27
November
Tony Romo is being interviewed via satellite on CBS’s pregame show, and one of the bullshit analysts says that he heard “Dukes of Hazard” was Romo’s favorite movie, and asks when he’ll be going on a date with Jessica Simpson. Romo, to his credit, is quick to correct the notion that he enjoyed that movie, [...]
20
November
I could be wrong, but I think Tom Jackson just advocated the physical beating of Randy Moss. I might have missed the first part of the sentence, but he said the right thing for Moss’s teammates to do is to givie him a “code red” and just beat the hell out of him. Oddly enough, [...]
13
November
Rudi Johnson isn’t starting for the Bengals for disciplinary reasons. Wait, let me try that again. Rudi Johnson isn’t starting for disciplinary reasons? Man, the Bengals are running out of good guys. About Wednesday, we’ll hear about Carson Palmer and Marvin Lewis murdering a transvestite hooker when some double team action went awry. Games I [...]
6
November
Why has ESPN moved Steve Young out of the studio? Is this something new, or did it happen a while ago, and I’m just noticing it… I’d hate to think that they shipped him out to make room for Ditka. Ditka might’ve been a great football coach, but I’d take Mike Tyson over Ditka in [...]